"give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, the wretched refuse of your teeming shore. send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed, to me: i lift my lamp beside the golden door."
- quote on the statue of liberty
i have always said it's not my job to judge...not people, not their choices, not their beliefs, not their experiences, not their interest in, or lack there of, in things i care about, not their sexual orientation, not their desire to marry or to create a life with someone that doesn't involve a ring or legalities. we aren't here to give our opinions on other people's lives simply because they differ from our own. while we are allowed to have opinions and beliefs, i find that many deem theirs superior and build a platform based upon "christian" beliefs - most of which truly undermine all things Christ lived - and died - for. who are we to tell others how to live or who to give their hearts to? who are we to look at another and take one piece of their life and diminish the value of them as a person because we dislike or disagree with that one thing? is our conscious so clear, our history so pristine, our closet so empty that we can honestly justify the judgement and persecution of others - most of which we have never even spoken to or know?
if you look back, the people who did the most good - who helped the most people - did so without question or hesitation. never did they ask someone who was hungry if he was gay or straight before feeding them. never did they question the validity of a relationship between a man and a woman before opening the door to them or giving them something of need. these things just don't matter when it comes to helping people. how does one's sexual orientation affect whether or not someone is worthy of help? it just doesn't.
the reason behind this post - this rant - is irrelevant. what is relevant is the sad reality that we have people - families with children - who go hungry, who sleep in cars, who search for one person to believe in them just enough to give them one little break. they love their children the same as i do, as you do. they want the best for their family just the same as you and i...they simply have been dealt a different hand and for many of them, the deck is stacked against them. i sit across a desk from people who open their lives to me...every dirty detail, every mistake, every fear...every hope, every dream, every plea...each laid out before me in the form of one simple request. for me to open our door to them and believe in them enough to give them the chance they need to survive...to step forward...to make a better life for them and their children.
one such mom literally walked to my office a couple weeks ago...no car, no job and three kids who were barely scraping by in the extended stay motel a few miles up the road. she poured out her heart, told me her story, opened the book of their lives to me hoping i could see past who she had become. what i first saw was a woman who had been beaten down, abused verbally and emotionally, left to flee with her children from everything they knew with nothing other than a few possessions....i watched her swipe away prideful tears and i saw a woman, a mom, who had a fire in her eyes...something i could only describe as hope...which is the one thing so many people are lacking when they finally reach our door. but, she had it and i instantly felt a connection to her. two days later we moved them in and a few days after that she was offered a job and found a car. she has told me more than once how thankful she is that i believed in her enough to give her a chance...that she believes she was lead there for a reason and that she can't believe a stranger would care enough about her to have faith in her...not just help her, but see her for who she is underneath her "homeless" exterior.
what she doesn't know is i am inspired by her...that her tears weren't the only ones shed...that her words gave me hope and helped me believe in myself and my ability to do my job...to make a difference.
i often wonder if Jesus were standing in front of me who He would see. would He say "well done, my child" or would He turn His head in shame. at the same time, i often wonder what others see when they look at me...do they see my invisible scars? are the aware of my insecurities and crazy obsessions? do they know i fear being misunderstood and forgotten? are they able to love me in spite of my uncontrollable interrupting and unending excitability that i know drives many crazy. do they know that when i'm quiet i am likely nervous or anxious about something? and do they know that while to most people i appear confident and extroverted, i'm actually quite shy and still feel the same need to be accepted as i did when i was 15? are they proud to call me friend? do they look forward to our time together? if asked, could they truly tell you who i am?
i'm honestly not sure. what i do know is i'm thankful to be surrounded by incredible people...a support system of family and friends who are counted among my "strengths". that is something so many i encounter are missing and it makes life that much more difficult for them. trust me, i struggle with lots of things when it comes to the families we serve...i have things that, for me, are more than i'm prepared, or equipped, to handle. but, i'm trying. i've always believed we never know who may be standing before us...that we should see others through Jesus' eyes and show them the same grace and kindness He would. so, i try. i may not always succeed, but i try. and i don't give a damn if they are married, single, straight, gay or living "in sin". none of that matters in the grand scheme of things and i'm fairly certain it doesn't matter what i think or believe when someone needs a roof, food and a little bit of hope.
one such mom literally walked to my office a couple weeks ago...no car, no job and three kids who were barely scraping by in the extended stay motel a few miles up the road. she poured out her heart, told me her story, opened the book of their lives to me hoping i could see past who she had become. what i first saw was a woman who had been beaten down, abused verbally and emotionally, left to flee with her children from everything they knew with nothing other than a few possessions....i watched her swipe away prideful tears and i saw a woman, a mom, who had a fire in her eyes...something i could only describe as hope...which is the one thing so many people are lacking when they finally reach our door. but, she had it and i instantly felt a connection to her. two days later we moved them in and a few days after that she was offered a job and found a car. she has told me more than once how thankful she is that i believed in her enough to give her a chance...that she believes she was lead there for a reason and that she can't believe a stranger would care enough about her to have faith in her...not just help her, but see her for who she is underneath her "homeless" exterior.
what she doesn't know is i am inspired by her...that her tears weren't the only ones shed...that her words gave me hope and helped me believe in myself and my ability to do my job...to make a difference.
i often wonder if Jesus were standing in front of me who He would see. would He say "well done, my child" or would He turn His head in shame. at the same time, i often wonder what others see when they look at me...do they see my invisible scars? are the aware of my insecurities and crazy obsessions? do they know i fear being misunderstood and forgotten? are they able to love me in spite of my uncontrollable interrupting and unending excitability that i know drives many crazy. do they know that when i'm quiet i am likely nervous or anxious about something? and do they know that while to most people i appear confident and extroverted, i'm actually quite shy and still feel the same need to be accepted as i did when i was 15? are they proud to call me friend? do they look forward to our time together? if asked, could they truly tell you who i am?
i'm honestly not sure. what i do know is i'm thankful to be surrounded by incredible people...a support system of family and friends who are counted among my "strengths". that is something so many i encounter are missing and it makes life that much more difficult for them. trust me, i struggle with lots of things when it comes to the families we serve...i have things that, for me, are more than i'm prepared, or equipped, to handle. but, i'm trying. i've always believed we never know who may be standing before us...that we should see others through Jesus' eyes and show them the same grace and kindness He would. so, i try. i may not always succeed, but i try. and i don't give a damn if they are married, single, straight, gay or living "in sin". none of that matters in the grand scheme of things and i'm fairly certain it doesn't matter what i think or believe when someone needs a roof, food and a little bit of hope.
No comments:
Post a Comment