“Oh the comfort, the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all right out, just as they are -- chaff and grain together -- certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and with the breath of kindness blow the rest away.”
― Elizabeth Barrett Browning
I've had a lot of time to think the past several months. This year has not been what I imagined it to be, at least not what I imagined it to be when I looked forward at this time last year. With each turn came uncertainty and questions, grief and a heightened awareness of my hopes for the future. I read this poem a couple years ago and wrote it in one of my many notebooks. I have read it and re-read it at least a hundred times. It sums up everything I want, everything I need out of a partner. It's funny, as I get older, I find that in some ways my list of "musts" becomes more detailed; but in all honesty, it all comes down to this - these words - "inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having to neither weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all right out, just as they are...certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and with the breath of kindness blow the rest away". To have someone love me like THAT. To take everything I am, everything I'm not, every wish, every dream, every hurt, every worry, every insecurity, every flaw, every triumph, every fail...to take it all and accept it, keeping all that is good and letting go of the rest.
There is a level of comfort that comes with feeling safe with someone, and for me, what I've learned is that feeling emotionally safe with someone is what I need; what makes me feel whole.
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